"I just try to live" – Why one trans woman says her life in the Highlands is a fortunate one ahead of Trans Day of Visibility
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Being able to get on with day-to-day life without fear of being subjected to abuse may sound like a bare minimum, rather than a fortunate position.
Unfortunately, with international Trans Day of Visibility fast approaching, that idea of being lucky is exactly how it feels for one trans person in the Highlands.
Having lived around Inverness for just over a decade, Kate has had very few incidents to speak of – and any time she has been met with a backlash over her identity she has thankfully been able to shrug it off and make a sarcastic retort.
With the benefit of hindsight, she can say she knew she was trans from the age of six. However, a lack of visibility and awareness of language meant that Kate did not begin to embrace her identity until she was 18, and even then it took a few more years until she began to transition.
"I didn't start doing anything about it until about 2020," Kate, now 28, explained.
"I was really scared to transition when I was 18, because back then there really wasn't much support out there as far as I could see.
"It may sound silly, but I've got a really good and supportive friend group – that's what made the difference.
"One of my good friends is a trans man. I saw the trouble that he was going through, which made me scared to open up. I was worried about his safety a lot, and my own safety as I was figuring everything out.
"Seeing what my friend was going through though, in college mind you, he got a lot of bullies going after him for a lot of random, little stuff. He normally just took it on the chin and brushed it off, but when I was working in a charity shop I had some similar issues.
"We need more awareness, and to be shown in a positive way.
"Rather than listening to the people that are the fake Christians, as I call them – because my grandma was a Christian and she loved everybody – who are preaching that we're against their Bible and will keep preaching until we're no longer here, we need to get away from that ideology
"We need to show those people that there are ways of respecting, even if they don't accept. What we need is more mutual respect."
Safe haven in the Highlands?
There are plenty of negative headlines around the world in regards to the trans community.
Overseas, legislation is being passed to outlaw LGBT+ identities and introduce restrictions similar to Section 28 in the UK (which banned the "promotion" of LGBT+ identities in public services, the effects of which are still being felt more than two decades after its removal), while many sports have banned trans women in particular from participating.
For Kate, much of the frustration comes from the general public acting as biological experts when they have no such background, but she is fully aware of the severity of the situation.
Arranging marriages with people in America has become a genuine prospect in order to help them flee the US, and it is seeing what is happening elsewhere that makes Kate feel like she is in a privileged position.
"It's quite good that the Highlands is pretty pro-LGBTQIA+, and it's the same with the islands from what I've heard out that way," she reasoned.
"I think as long as it's not shoved down anyone's throats, it's perfectly fine, and I don't try to shove it down anyone's throat – I just try to live.
"I have had no issues here at all. I can walk around without being heckled or anything.
"I was scared to at first, because I knew it was a scared community and I thought it wouldn't be good, but they've been really lovely and welcoming to me. I just went out with a couple of friends once dressed as my true self, and nobody bothered us.
"This is my experience with it – if you ask some other people they might say a completely different story.
"It also depends on where they live. I got lucky, I live in a pretty nice area of Beauly where people don't really care."
Putting the "visibility" in Trans Day of Visibility
A key component of Trans Day of Visibility is to share and celebrate success stories from the trans community.
However, with so much negative attention directed towards them, it would be difficult to blame any trans person for not wanting to shout about their identity in case it makes them a target for abuse.
Although beginning to transition relatively recently, Kate has already seen the positive effects of embracing her authentic self – and that is something to be proud of.
"This will be my third Trans Day of Visibility since coming out, and I'm still not really sure what it means to me," she added.
"I don't properly celebrate it like some bigger places do, but I'm proud of myself for being me. I'm happier now. I've been slowly coming off anti-depressants ever since I came out.
"I used to be angry and sad, I was drinking a lot to try and find an escape from what was going through my head, and from real life. I'm going to have to suffer from that for the rest of my life, but it's getting easier to cope with.
"I would like to see something happen to mark the day in the Highlands – not anything over the top like I would say some places do, but a little memorial service for ones who have lost their lives like Brianna (Ghey).
"Even if we had a minute's silence or something like that, rather than it just being like 'oh, you do exist'.
"Personally, I think the media is quite straight and white-washed a lot of the time. Everywhere I look, it's people assigned female or people assigned male at birth talking about trans people. We're here too, so talk to us.
"As the world stands, people will still be hesitant to come out as trans. Trans youth are being targeted and told that they are too young to make that decision, but they're just trying to live as much as anyone else.
"My experience has been somewhat smooth, but I've got a decent support network and decent people that I surround myself with – both online and offline. I can't say that will be the case for every trans person."
